JMNT(i)
20 in accordance with my looking away – with my head stretched out to watch – and [the] expectation (or: hope) that within nothing will I proceed being put to shame (disgrace; embarrassment), but to the contrary, within all freedom of speech (boldness and public openness which comes from being a citizen) – as always, even now (at the present moment) – Christ will progressively be made great (be magnified; be enlarged) within my body, whether through life, or through death!
21 For you see, to me, to be living [is] Christ (or: For the [situation] in me and for me, life [is the] Anointed One), and to be dying [is] gain (advantage; profit).
22 et since (or: Now if) [p46, D: Whether] the [situation] is to continue living within flesh (= in a physical body in the natural realm), this for me (or: in me) [will be] a fruit from work (produce relating to [my] action) – and so what (or: which) I will proceed choosing (taking to myself in preference; [p46, B: I should and could choose]) I am not presently making known.
23 So I am being continuously held together (or: caught; squeezed) from out of the two: constantly having the craving (holding the strong desire and impulse) into the [situation] to untie and loose back up again [as in loosing tent pins and ropes when striking camp, or loosing moorings to set sail], and to be (to exist being) together with Christ – for [that is] rather to a much higher rank (a more advantageous situation; a more profitable thing; [it is] much better)!